Words to keep me sane

Sometimes the only action you can take is to let go.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Peace Train


So at work I recently discovered Pandora, which is my new favorite way to add some enjoyment to my day. I have created a mellow work "radio" station for my listening enjoyment and lately it has been playing Peace Train by Cat Stevens about once a day. I love this song. The words and the rhythm make me smile. With tomorrow being my baseline ultrasound day for IVF #1, I've decided to adopt the concept of a Peace Train for this cycle. Heretofore the best theme I could come up with was the traditional "roller coaster." In the interest of a positive attitude I thought that Peace Train might have a better connotation. If all looks good tomorrow, then I will officially climb aboard and ask the conductor (mental image of my RE in a train conductor's cap) to punch my ticket. So far the lupron isn't making me too crazy. My moods have surprisingly remained mostly stable and no one in my immediate presence has suffered any undeserved bodily harm thus far. Of course this is subject to change. I have been fretting somewhat about my initial follistime dosage. My previous injectable/IUI cycles showed me to be a good bordering on ridiculous responder and from what I've read on other blogs my dosage seems on the high side. I talked to one of the nurses about this and she seemed surprised that I would question the dose. My closest-thing-to-a-lupron moment might have have been when I emphatically told her I DO NOT WANT TO HYPERSTIMULATE AND I DON'T FEEL THE NEED TO PRODUCE 30 EGGS! She assured me that the dose can be reduced if my levels rise too quickly. The bitchy, pessimistic side of me is already rehearsing my "I told you so" speech and in my weaker moments I have already envisioned my cycle being canceled because my ovaries are in danger of exploding. Clearly I have some pre-stim anxiety going on here. I realize I need to trust my doctor and the process, however, given that it is my body I am inclined to think that I know better. Time will tell. Must remember: "now I've been happy lately, thinking about the good things to come and I believe it could be, something good has begun." Off to pack for my journey and planning to leave mental baggage behind.

9 comments:

Geohde said...

What's your dose?

I started on 100 IU, increased partway through stims, but still got 17 eggs.

mchope said...

They are starting me on 1 of Menopur and 225 of Follistim.

mchope said...

For clarification, I heard from my RE's office this morning. He plans to drop my dose on Sunday. Apparently the higher dose to start out with is to "fire me up" in the beginning. I guess I need to start trusting his expertise. :)

JJ said...

I LOVE pandora--it plays some good tunes!
Hope that all the dosing gets worked out ok!

gracechild said...

choo! choo!! we're on the same train. Started on 1 menopur + 75 follistim (really stings). good luck.

Pamela Jeanne said...

I'm a huge Cat Stevens fan. Here's another one for you to add to your list: Ruby love.

I'm glad you're adopting this attitude for your cycle. It will go a long way to making it less stressful.

Thanks, too, for your most insightful comment yesterday. Love your thinking...

Kami said...

I had 225 IU twice a day. I was 38 and it turned out to be just right. I haven't heard Cat Stevens for years, but I listened a lot when I was a kid. My favorite was called Moon Shadow (I think)

Meghan said...

Good luck with it all!

I wish I had the pen, but I was only taking 75 IU so it wasn't worth it.

Grad3 said...

Just wanted you to know what I was thinking of you... Hugs